Thursday, June 9, 2011

Frustrated

I'm too sick to go to the doc.  That's pretty sad.  I had to go to the doctor on Tuesday to get some of my medicines refilled, but my little Holly had a seizure.  She is okay now and they were able to get me rescheduled for today at 1:15.  I'd felt fine all day yesterday (besides this 100 degree heat and humidity!), but today I just couldn't get ready.  I give myself a lot of time to get ready to go somewhere because it takes me twice as long as it used to.  I was so tired by the time I had to put clothes on that I had to lay down on the bed.  I kept trying to get up and put my clothes on, but I was so tired I just couldn't do it.  Of course at this point I was hot and sweaty and I hadn't even blow dried my hair b/c it just makes me even hotter.  I couldn't do it.  Some days it's not a problem and I can get ready with no issues.  What am I supposed to do when I need my medicine? That's just so frustrating to me. I just have to tough it out until I can see my doctors.  I feel like having my insides eaten by this stupid disease is "toughing it out" enough, but I guess not.  Guilt sets in when I begin to think that way because I know so many have it much worse.
  A few minutes after laying down I called the nurse at my doc's office and left her a message and explaining to her that the heat combined with my Lupus prevented me from making it to my appointment.  Hopefully they can work with me on this.  It gets me upset sometimes that even the simplest things are interrupted.

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